Crows

Crows, crows, and more crows…..

Read all about it! Visit my online store domenica mastromatteo and find out what it's all about!

Nutella Cheesecake

I'm usually a purist when it comes to nutella, but this combination is awesome!

And so easy to make!

Let's begin….

Place a small cookie cutter on a plate. Place a large piece of plastic wrap over the cookie cutter. 

Set aside.

Combine crumbs and melted butter in a small bowl. I made the crumbs by grinding oreo cookies with with a coffee grinder. My kids didn't mind scooping out the centres of the oreos for themselves!

Press the crumb mixture into the center of the cookie cutter; on top of the plastic wrap. Set aside.

Mix nutella and cream cheese until well blended. 

Scoop mixture on top of the cookie crumbs. 

Press down with a spoon. 

Use the excess plastic wrap to cover the tiny cake. 

Freeze for until firm; about 1 hour. 

Unwrap.

Enjoy! 

Morning - Typography

I'm adding Typography to my artwork….it makes sense….I've been doing it for years! And now I'll finally catalogue it in my portfolio. Prices coming soon!

Balance

I can hear the eagles where I live. Sometimes, I look up at the sky and see them soaring above. I do most of my writing work at the dinning room table (my desk is stacked with papers I don’t want to look at). Today was the day…..All week I had the blank document with the only word “Balance” typed on it…today, I would start writing something worth sharing. But as I stared at my document, I heard the eagle calling.  I stood up to draw open the curtains and there he was. Magnificent. Huge. Closer than ever before.

I am privileged. Yes. And I wonder if that is what ‘s stopping me. I am part of a culture that feels we are entitled to be happy. And carpe diem has been engraved in our souls. Except, without fully understanding the consequences of that and without respecting the bigger picture. Without understanding that, sometimes, happiness comes with a price.

I am privileged to have the time to think about what balance means to me. In January 2014, I picked up a copy of the “Real Simple” magazine. The title of the issue was, Balance, and I thought, “I could use some of that.” But I didn’t learn anything about IT or how to get IT in the magazine. There is one piece of writing in the magazine, by Jennifer Senior (a contributor to Real Simple and to New York magazine), I cut out and saved on my bulletin board. She writes, “I think life balance is worth striving for, but it’s a pretty high-class problem.” She also writes, “I can’t see how real balance, at least as we fantasize about it, is achievable. I am skeptical about the need for balance anyway.” And I totally agree with her. End of story, right? But, for over a year, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about balance and what it means to me. And why is it so important that I get it?

Everyone thinks I need some. Maybe, I do. Maybe, I already have some….I mean, I do everything….but I’m not happy with everything and most of the time, I feel like I’m juggling too many things as my balance keeps shifting. And then I get lost in the whole Idea of balance and my thoughts return to the beginning as I ask myself again, what is balance?

I recently read a highly energetic blog post by a popular Vancouver mom blogger who I will not name. I am sure she is awesome. Her article was awesome. She wrote about how to have everything with details about how she gets it all done. And the comments to her blog were filled with applause and praise for showing women about how they could really have it all; children, loving husband, and career (multiple careers). Is she balanced? It definitely sounds like she is balanced.

Is balance about getting everything we want, without making any sacrifices? That’s totally unrealistic. Something’s gotta give. So when you look at your life and realize it’s not like Mommy Blogger’s. It’s not because you failed, it’s because you’re living a real complicated life. And that’s okay. And that is Carpe diem; enjoying what you have right now. Living right now. Not for some illusion media is dangling in front of you. Society, time, culture….all of them have a funny way of distorting the true definition of words in such a way that we get caught up in an illusion and we spend our life striving for the impossible.

Balance isn’t something to achieve, it’s something we just do….everyday and some of us better than others. The merriam-webster dictionary defines balance as “the ability to move or to remain in a position without losing control.” But what we really want is to be in a position where changing and losing control just isn’t an option and we may define balance as such a state…it’s crazy how we complicate the English language.

I still have the urge to simplify the word Balance and come up with some solution on how I’ll get IT, or do IT. Do you get IT? Do you do IT? Or is IT just a state of being?

After my year (and more) of analysis on the word, Balance, I still believe that it doesn’t mean that we can have everything and be happy. Sorry, Mommy Blogger, but I don’t believe you. And although you are doing a great job attracting readers, I really believe they would benefit not from hearing about how you get it all done….because, really, we all know what we need to do….but they would benefit by reading about how you overcome your struggles. What did you have to give up? And why it’s okay. It’s okay that it didn’t all happen today, because most of us get to wake up tomorrow and try again. How wonderful is that?

Think of balance as your diet. We all need a balanced diet, but we know that we can’t have it all in one sitting. We have to spread our nutrients along an entire day and, maybe, a week. And if we tried to get all our nutrients in a signal meal, we would just fail….it’s not possible. If you wash down your milk (calcium) with a steak (iron), it’s useless in your body. The calcium will interact with iron in such a way that your body will not absorb the iron. So enjoy your steak, but hold off on the milk and cheese until a few hours later. And when you look at the big picture; your diet throughout the week, you’ll realize that, maybe, it was balanced.

So think of the big picture. You may not be able to raise four happy children and have a successful career at the same time, and that’s okay. When you look at the big picture of your life, you’ll realize you can have everything….just not all at once.

Romance

Remember that? Romance.

Duh?

What?

A few weeks ago, my cousin’s wife posted a picture on Facebook of her home; decorated in hearts for Valentine’s Day. All I could think is, ugh….where does she get the energy? She has two girls; two lovely girls, I’m sure. I have four monsters. Everyday chores are more than I can bear. Adding holidays to my list of things to do is just cruel.

So sad. Everything feels like so much work! Where’s the magic? And when it comes to Valentine’s Day, I guess I should ask, where is the romance?

According to The Gottman Institute, “Research shows that within three years after the birth of a baby, approximately 2/3 of couples will experience a significant drop in relationship quality and have a dramatic increase in conflict and hostility.” It is an international social problem; one that I am not immune to. Richard and I are busy…..what romance?

So I have to put my pride aside and say Valentine’s Day is for people like me; people who need that yearly reminder that Romance is important. A reminder of the part of myself that I’ve been ignoring for too long. Before children, LOVE was everything. I engulfed myself in love poetry, held on to sentimental thoughts; danced in love’s energy….life was beautiful.

I’m reminded of the article entitled, “How American Parenting is Killing the American Marriage” on qz.com. Danielle Teller writes, “Nothing in life is allowed to be more important than our children, and we must never speak a disloyal word about our relationships with our offspring. Children always come first. We accept this premise so reflexively today that we forget that it was not always so.”

Another thing to pondor, “In the 21st century, most Americans marry for love. We choose partners who we hope will be our soulmates for life. When children come along, we believe that we can press pause on the soulmate narrative, because parenthood has become our new priority and religion. We raise our children as best we can, and we know that we have succeeded if they leave us, going out into the world to find partners and have children of their own. Once our gods have left us, we try to pick up the pieces of our long neglected marriages and find new purpose. Is it surprising that divorce rates are rising fastest for new empty nesters? Perhaps it is time that we gave the parenthood religion a second thought.”

Sadly, that’s what I sometimes think….parenting is so hard, I want to press pause on my relationship with Richard. But life is an ever-changing organic experience. I can’t press pause. Relationships can’t be frozen, to be played at a better time. While waiting for the right time to come along, things are changing, people are changing, and a relationship that hasn’t been taken care of will fall apart.

And for those of you who still feel that children need to be our number one priority; further research has shown that relationship discord and conflict have a profound negative effect on infants and toddlers (and no doubt, on the development of our adolescent children as well).

I guess it’s very timely I am just starting to offer the Bring Baby Home Program developed by the Gottman’s at The Relationship Research Institute in Seattle. The goal of the program is to improve the quality of life for babies and children by strengthening the parental relationship.

And what about my relationship with Richard? You may ask. I have all the literature and research summaries on how to maintain a solid relationship; and it’s all very helpful. It really is. Just looking through the literature floods me with wonderful memories of our shared love.

How do I get over my “ugh” for Valentine’s Day?  William Shakespeare wrote, “Sweet love, renew thy force….do not kill the spirit of love with a perpetual dullness…” I found solace and a renewed energy in those long forgotten love poems I used to read in my youth.  I didn’t just brush my ambivalence away or accept my frustration over preparing for “another holiday” as the current state of affairs. What I’m trying to say is I’m making an effort to look for Romance and I’m finding it everywhere. Remember my blog, “Travelling with Children”? I explained that we can look at things in different perspectives and make arguments to prove each perspective right. I’m finding proof that there is Romance everywhere and Valentine’s Day gives us a wonderful moment to celebrate love.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

  

A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words

"A picture is worth a thousand words."

When I saw Silvia Simpson's (of Silvia's Photography)  photograph of my daughters (above), I new it was time to start creating my vision of Sensational Children. The picture just screamed, "SENSATIONAL CHILDREN"and everything that needs to be done to make sure children remain sensational!

Dr. Gabor Mate writes about how the disfunction of the world can be mirrored in an individual (In The Realm of Hungry Ghosts). When I learned about my son's disorder, sensory processing disorder (SPD), I recognized much of what was lacking in society's common practice of child rearing….Sensational Children (for me) was always more than "just" advocating SPD. It's about treating all children with the respect they deserve.

Wouldn't it be wonderful to practice mindful parenting and consciously download (into our children) information that will serve our children? Much of what we do arises from automatic programming that bypasses conscious awareness and may even run contrary to our intentions. Decisions that we may believe to be freely made can arise from unconscious emotional drives or subliminal beliefs. They can be dictated by brain mechanisms programmed early in childhood and determined by events of which we have no recollection. In the real world, choice, will and responsibility are not absolute and unambiguous concepts. People choose, decide and act in a context. That context is determined by how their brain functions. Brain development is influenced by conditions over which the individual, as a young child, had no choice whatsoever (summarized from In The Realm of Hungry Ghosts). If we are responsible for the programs that are downloaded into our children, let's download healthy ones.

Through my parenting workshops, parents will learn the skills for supporting their most important work; their children. I'm certified to teach Positive Discipline, and the Bringing Baby Home and Emotion Coaching Programs from the Gottman Institute. I would love to teach them all….all the time….but as a parent myself, I'm balancing my love for sharing these wonderful concepts with others to implementing them with my children. And implementing them takes most of my time. My children need me. And my experience as a parent can only add to my usefulness as a facilitator.

Our children need us to be mindful of our parenting, they also need time to connect with others and time to unwind, time to integrate their experience while they play out what they hear and see; time and a safe place for their creativity to blossom. I want to create a space for children to do just that; and as a life-long artist, I can't think of any other place than my art studio. Elliot Eisner, Art Education Researcher and Scholar, says, “The arts enable us to have experience we can have from no other source.”  Through creativity, our children learn adaptability, what Dr. Shimi Kang (writer of The Dolphin Way) admits is the number one skill our children will need in the 21st century. Sensational Children would not be complete without Sensational Art. But I'm not sure what that will look like yet.

As I work through the licensing criteria (for my whole vision of Sensational Children), things keep changing. Doors close, but there are still so many open. The process of bringing my vision to life is not a straight path; it's organic and changes. As Steve Jobs said, “You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something – your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever.” I trust my vision will take the shape it needs to; also, I trust that my journey (itself) will spark (in many) the realization that raising children (that children themselves) are THE MOST IMPORTANT WORK.

Puffed Quinoa Nutella Balls

These were awesome, but needed a little tweaking. My plan was to experiment and post the final results…

maybe, one day…

Today, I'll give you the quick version of what I did and what i plan to do. If you get the right formulation, send it to me, please!

________________

To make:

Carefully warm 1/2 cup of Nutella on medium/low heat. Remove from heat, Mix in

1 cup puffed quinoa

1 cup oats

2 tbsp chia

2 tbsp ground flax seed

 To assemble:

shape into round balls

place onto a baking sheet

pour melted dark chocolate on each ball

cool.

Enjoy!

Finding My Element

I know what I like to do….everything….and people who say there is always enough time for everything; don’t really know what everything means. Today, everything means I want to do pottery, paint in my art studio….which is a complete mess….I want to unpack ALL those boxes, organize ALL the contents, have the time to read through ALL those old books then write about how wonderful it ALL was. But my day will end soon and I will have to pick up children from their different schools and daycares. Then, I have to do everything for everyone else…yes, I know, I don’t HAVE TO; they are old enough to start doing things, but really, I do want a relationship with my children and hiding in my studio, pouring over "Notes To Myself" by Hugh Prather, isn’t really relationship building. So, let me add “have relationships” to the list of things I want to do. I also want to make an awesome supper, and have a spotless kitchen. And all of this must happen now.

            So I’m trying to do all of the above. Exhausted (of course) because my mind wants to do more than my body (and time) will allow. As I unpack and organize all the items of one box, I hold the book, Notes to Myself, and sit down….time to pour over Hugh Prather’s words. I open the book to page….? There are no pages in his book, but there is a bookmark marking a passage that reads, “There is a part of me that wants to write, a part that wants to theorize, a part that wants to sculpt, a part that wants to teach….To force myself into a single role, to decide to be just one thing in life, would kill off large parts of me.” Ta-da! My thoughts in someone else’s book!

            I’m becoming okay with wanting to do everything because I realize there is a large need for what I do. People want to buy my art (I’m having technical difficulties with my art website…ugh, that is something I do not want to do…but I WILL have a website for my art soon.). When I read, I gain new perspectives on THINGS and bring so much more to my parenting classes, parents need that. Most parents don’t have the time and don’t want to read and sift through all of the crazy information out there. I LOVE doing it and I LOVE presenting concepts and watching the a-ha’s in everyone’s faces. I love to teach. I love to support my children, I even like making supper for them (as long as they’re not whining and complaining!). And I want to support other people’s children. There is a huge need for an alternate form of daycare, lots of moms (and some dads) are at home with children and just want to get out and introduce their children to something meaningful. Not the noisy community centres with the structured activities that allow for no creativity. Come to my house, you can do whatever you want, with the security of knowing that the interactions and choice of activities are interlaced with a sweet theme that promotes social emotional learning.

            I’ve forgotten about that. The theme! I’ve been so busy looking for myself and “my element” as Ken Robinson refers to it, that I forgot to just be me and just do what it is I do. I used to write a phrase on the blackboard, our theme of the week, and we’d all talk about it. In the coming week (in my home) I’ll introduce the theme of “finding your element”. My kids are not too young to start being mindful of the activities they enjoy. This will lead them to better career choices in the future.

            So much to do….so little time….And I know, I don’t have to do it all right now. And I know, life will take me in so many different direction and it’s all okay. I love the fact that my life is not linear. As Ken Robinson writes in “Finding Your Element”, Life is organic, “My life, like yours, is a constant process of improvisation between my interest and personality on the one hand and circumstances and opportunities on the other.”

Eye of Round Premium Beef Roast

Welcome Fall.
It's been raining in Vancouver….finally? We've had beautiful weather until now, but the rain started.
And I thought it was time to turn on the oven and prepare fragrant, comforting meals. I decided on roast beef. But, it's been so long since I last made a beef roast…I wasn't sure what to do. What type of beef cut to purchase, how to dress it, how long to cook it, etc.
It turns out the grocery store just had the one cut of beef (eye of round). (And I didn't feel like a special trip to the butcher's).
Now what? I looked through my cooking Bible, The Joy of Cooking, but couldn't find any information on how long the roast needed to cook. This was important, because I would be leaving it in the oven while picking kids up from school. I needed to know that I wouldn't over cook the beef….and I didn't think there was enough time for me to start the roasting after I picked up the kids from school.
Canadabeef.ca gave me the answers I wanted. It's awesome! I'm so glad I discovered it! How did I survive without this site? You have to check it out.
So I roasted my 1.1 kg cut of beef for 2 hours adding the vegetables to the pan 1/2 hour before the meat was done (when the meat thermometer registers rare, 140 degrees Fahrenheit). A butcher once told me to add a broth to cover half the roast…so I tried that and yum! So handy when you have kids. I pour the broth over noodles. And we have a complete meal! You'll find the recipe at the end if this post.

It needs gravy. 

I forget how much flour to add to the stock, so I look up Martha Stewart's gravy. I don't have drippings, as they get absorbed into the broth, but I make due. Here's my gravy: 

I usually have more stock than I need, so yesterday, I boiled Jane's flour noodles in the extra stock….she loved it!

Chocolate - Walnut Cake

So my kids come home after spending a week with their dad at the farm. I'm handed a bag-full of walnuts from their walnut tree. Yum!!! And all I could think of was CAKE!

Chocolate-Walnut Cake

The recipe looks complicated, but it's really very simple…and the ingredients are similar to what you would find in a power bar - walnuts, dates, chocolate….packed with protein and (it has some) iron…..and so yummy! 

Combine dates, cocoa and warm freshly brewed coffee. Let stand for at least 20 minutes.

Combine bread, walnut pieces, flour, and salt in a food processor and process until finely ground. Place crumb mixture in a large bowl. 

Combine the date mixture, 1/3 cup granulated sugar, oil, vanilla, and 1 egg in food processor and process until smooth, scraping the sides of the bowl once. 

Add the date mixture to the crumb mixture, stir well.  

Beat egg whoites with a mizer at high speed until soft peaks form.
Gradually add 1/3 cup of sugar, 1 tablespoon at a time, until stiff peaks form. 
Gently stir one-fourth of the egg-white mixture into the batter; gently fold in the remaining egg white mixture. 

Spread batter into prepared pan. Bake at 350 for 25 minutes or until cake center springs back when lightly touched. 
Cool in pan, on a wire rack for 10 minutes.
Remove from pan and remove wax paper. Cool completely. 
To prepare glaze, stir chocolate and cream in a small heavy saucpan over low heat until melted and smooth. Spoon over cake.

My Summer Garden

Our landscaping is still a mess!

Okay, it's not this bad anymore, 

but I'm assuming it'll take the summer to get the yard in order, so 

I'm growing a little garden in pots…

View THE BEGINNING at my summer garden page

I'm Back….with barbecue ribs!

My parenting workshop was great….i loved preparing for it, leading the discussions….and blogging.

But everything else…housework….personal blogging….trying out new recipes….was ignored. Reminds me of an article on "Balance" from Life Simple Magazine that I wanted to blog about…maybe, one day. 

Today….I am back with a recipe! Awesome recipe! My daughter, Kate, wanted ribs for supper. Most store-bought barbecue sauces (maybe, all of them) have cornstarch and other preservatives that we've eliminated from our diet….so I had to make a barbecue sauce from scratch. And after looking through my recipe books and google picks for barbecue sauces, I picked my favourite ingredients and the simplest cooking method and …

(as Jane would say….) 

Ta Da!!!

Parenting The Positive Discipline Way

positive discipline

register now for the workshop starting next week at 

(new time!! 7:30)

CE Hours Granted

May 6, 2014 - 7:30-9pm

May 13, 20, 27 2014 - 7:00-8:30pm

West Vancouver Memorial Library

Elizabeth Musto Room, 1950 Marine Drive

Register at

sensationalchildren.ca

Positive discipline is based on Adler's belief that all human beings are equal and deserving of being treated with dignity and respect.

Parents (and teachers) have an obligation to provide opportunities for children to develop responsibility and motivations. We can turn the challenges we have with our children into the opportunities to develop the characteristics and life skills we want our children to possess. We'll learn how in the 4-part workshop series starting next week at 7:30!

Positive Discipline Workshops

Summer’s Coming!

Are you ready? 

for the....

whining.... temper tantrums.... power struggles.... sibling conflict.... THE ATTITUDE....

....and the shouting, nagging, bribing and punishing?

or is it time for a change? 

start this summer differently.... 

Learn some common sense solutions....

In a four session parenting class based on 
the best selling Positive Discipline books by Dr. Jane Nelsen.

Tuesday evenings, 7:00-8:30pm

May 6, 13, 20, 27

West Vancouver Memorial Library

Register at:
sensationalchildren.ca

single $80; Couple $120

Not Sure?

Try the Free Introductory Class

April 29, 2014

7-8:30pm

DIY Terrarium

So we bought a house with an overgrown garden that (really) is a treasure box of interesting plants. After researching terrariums on the web, (inspired) the kids and I (bucket in hand) went hunting for plants and pretty rocks….
following Michelle's (from 4 Men, 1 Lady) photo below

we lay down our treasures…. 

and we created our terrariums!